Eating Out With the Fussy Eater
You want to eat out with your fussy eating children, but you picture this:
* Kids whining at the table
* Siblings kicking and picking at each other
* Kids’ tantrums, outbursts, and demands when they don’t get their fussy appetites satisfied
…and you shudder at the thought and drop the idea. You have problems enough with fussy eating at home---who wants to battle with the fussy eater when you go out to eat?
Wait! You need not do this. It is possible to manage fussy eaters with my simple and straightforward approach.
Eating-Out Rules for Fussy Eaters:
* Rule 1: You eat healthy, or do not eat at all.
Here is where it all begins. Before walking in, define clearly the type of food that you will order. There will be no negotiations for the fussy eater, no matter what!
The trick here is to try to do this your first few times when there are at least two adults at the table, who are ready to follow the game plan.
* Rule 2: Eat in peace.
Inform the children, even the fussy eaters, that they can enjoy eating out as long as they do not complain, whine, hit, kick, yell, or show tantrums. Even when mom or dad corrects an unhealthy choice, your fussy eater is free to be unhappy, but that no whining or complaining is permitted.
* Rule 3: One Warning Only For Fussy Eater Complaints
The first—and JUST THE FIRST—time the kids are found getting out-of-hand, they will get the FIRST warning. You simply remind them of the rules, and that the second time will mean…
* Rule 4: Eat Out Time Out
Inform the children, that if they If you do not eat peacefully, and without complaints, there will be an ‘Eat Out Time Out.” This means one of you takes the problem children to the car, and sits until there is three minutes of quiet.
Did I really say three minutes? Of quiet? Yes, I did.
Be prepared to take very strong action, and be willing to sit in the car for as long as it takes. If they miss their entire meal, play it very cool and have the other parent bring out mom or dad’s meal to eat on the way home.
Moreover, let the complainers go hungry. This is critical!
On the other hand, if they make it through the three minutes, return to the restaurant.
* Rule 5: Repeat as often as needed.
Your fussy eaters need to understand that you will not give in to their tantrums, whining, and complaining. They usually want to eat unhealthy foods, and believe you will give it.
If you do, you have lost. Both short term and long term.
Instead, stick to the plan. Explain to them that breaking the rules will lead them to the car again and they will remain there until mom and dad finish their meal. Moreover, mom and dad will not pack any food home. Make them realize that mom and dad are serious and you will let them skip the meal.
You may have to repeat this several times to help your fussy eaters realize that you are serious about the rules. Children that are more stubborn require extra trips to the car before they learn.
For parents of fussy eaters…
* Do not make the rules unless you are serious about them.
You have to be serious about the rules before implementing them, or else you weaken your credibility.
* Be steady in your decision.
Whatever be the situation or your stamina level, you have to be steady in following rules. However, do not expect your children to learn immediately or at the first trip of eating out. Teach your fussy eaters from the actual consequences, and not from the threat of consequences. Even if you are too tired to take your child to the car for breaking the rule, you MUST FOLLOW THROUGH. If you skip, then your rules will have no effect.
Do Not Nag, Preach, Remind, And Correct Constantly
Avoid paying attention to your child’s unwanted behavior, or else you will encourage it to grow. When your fussy eater starts showing signs of complaints or whining at the table, simply ignore it and take him or her to the car. Correcting or lecturing will not help.
Notice Your Kids When They Are Behaving Properly
Acknowledge your children with a smile, a nod, or a touch when they are quiet and under control at the table. This encourages the development of healthy behavior, at home and outside.
Remember, all children, and particularly your fussy eaters, learn by experiencing the consequences---not just by hearing the threat or learning a new set of rules. Action will be your best friend, if you are willing to be more action oriented than word or threat oriented.
Learn more on how to deal with fussy eater visit Dr. Cale's Cure Your Picky Eter.
